The Bachelor and Bachelorette forums on Television Without Pity (TWOP) should be fun. Right? The show is a ridiculous idea, dramatically staged, and at least recently, nice eye candy in different countries. The mainly women audience is full of  stories of our own durm and strang in the dating trenches. Or, it should be, if it wasn’t being constantly chided and squashed and slashed by the worst, most overcontrolling mod on TWoP, Barnes. What a witch, and I’m so tempted to use the b word.

bachelorette ali on jimmy kimmel

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For Illustration Friday: subject is GIANT. Well, we look like giants to them. But my real giant – the only cartoon I’ve ever done with one! – is here. That was another topic for IF!

INSECTS CONTROL THE FUTURE CARTOON

Caption: Never forget, Benton, the future is ours.

You always read that at the world’s end, only the insects will survive to live another day.  Bugs will inherit the earth. Makes sense. They say it about roaches, but they are too disgusting to draw, so I picked some generic beetle.

I kind of like drawing bugs, if there was more of a market for them! What about a comic panel called Ugly… Would you read it?

That is one of the most popular names on Television Without Pity (TWOP). The other one is bitchface, most often used to describe dancers (only women, of course) on DWTS who don’t smile enough. Pageant like. Because a beautiful woman who doesn’t smile is…dangerous? I’ve never figured that out.

But I think last night was the first time I heard a reality star use it herself on TV, when Vienna called Jake a famewhore in the first 2 minutes on the Bachelorette. (Note to Mike Fleiss: I don’t like ambiguity in the start times of MY tv. Make the show an hour or a half, but don’t split it at 40 minutes or whatever. It doesn’t become you.)

vienna and jake before, from People Mag

Apparently, I’m the only one in the civilized reality TV watching world that thinks Vienna is trash. I liked her on Jake’s show, and I liked her with Jake, although I didn’t like Jake. I was interested that they poked him to be on Dancing with the Stars, though, and I found myself rooting for him there! I thought he’d be a big fat instant Fail, because he’s not much of a body/toucher/mover boy, but he has instinctive rhythm and grace, tried really hard, and was actually much better than many of the other amateurs.  I was really disappointed when he was voted out.

Also: unlike most of the TWOPers, I thought Chelsea was the douche as her dancing partner. Wow, totally lost respect for her (and for Tony, with Kate Gosselin.) They are supposed to be supportive pro teachers, figuring out how to bring out the best from their partners. If you can’t teach, leave, and just perform in the pro dances. I mean, wth, don’t start fights with your partner in that arrogant way.

Anyway, was sad to hear Jake and Vienna split, but SHOCKED to hear she actually sold the details of her sex life to a tabloid!!! Okay, you can drop the “fame” part of that word, now. Wow, how low-class can you get.

Again, no one on TWOP agrees with me, so thank goodness I have my little blog! :)

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I just wanted to see if you were awake.

if a snake....cartoon

Yeah, I did a bunch of condom cartoons. I think it was for National Lampoon, when they had a call-out for condom and nun cartoons, but not in the same cartoon. I feel I know more about snakes than nuns.

I don’t think they ever did the round-up, which is a pity, because I did some pretty great cartoons on this. A man’s magazine (Penthouse?) used one, I think.

For Illustration Friday: Slither.

For Google: COPPERHEAD: Deadly snake, or condom holder? You decide.