Pretend you are in your 20s. Get a feminine or minority name. Make your drawings look more like grade school drawings, or at least someone who has only done it for a few months.

And be less funny, because every year the New Yorker rewards us with less funny and surprising work.

You made a comment about me being an inspiration.

No matter how much I succeed at this business there are still some things I have not done that make me feel like a failure in some respects. One is not ever having been in the NYer. I ask myself, “How could I have never appeared in the New Yorker?

I must be doing something wrong. There are cartoonists in there who do work not unlike the sort of stuff with me.