A hair job? Like a nose job or boob job, but not as permanent. Topic for Illustration Friday: artificial. You know, like dying gray hair is artificial. Btw, the TWOP…
Tag: <span>bachelorette</span>
The Bachelor and Bachelorette forums on Television Without Pity (TWOP) should be fun. Right? The show is a ridiculous idea, dramatically staged, and at least recently, nice eye candy staged in various pretty countries. The mainly women audience in TWOP often talks about their own stories of durm and strang in the dating trenches. Real life on a forum about reality. Fun!
Or, it would be, if it wasn’t being constantly chided and squashed and slashed by the worst, most overcontrolling mod on TWoP, Barnes. What a witch, and I’m so tempted to use the b word.
That is one of the most popular names on Television Without Pity (TWOP). The other one is bitchface, most often used to describe dancers (only women, of course) on DWTS who don’t smile enough. Pageant like. Because a beautiful woman who doesn’t smile is…dangerous? I’ve never figured that out.
But I think last night was the first time I heard a reality star use it herself on TV, when Vienna called Jake a famewhore in the first 2 minutes on the Bachelorette. (Note to Mike Fleiss: I don’t like ambiguity in the start times of MY tv. Make the show an hour or a half, but don’t split it at 40 minutes or whatever. It doesn’t become you.)
Apparently, I’m the only one in the civilized reality TV watching world that thinks Vienna is trash. I liked her on Jake’s show, and I liked her with Jake, although I didn’t like Jake. I was interested that they poked him to be on Dancing with the Stars, though, and I found myself rooting for him there! I thought he’d be a big fat instant Fail, because he’s not much of a body/toucher/mover boy, but he has instinctive rhythm and grace, tried really hard, and was actually much better than many of the other amateurs.? I was really disappointed when he was voted out.
Also: unlike most of the TWOPers, I thought Chelsea was the douche as her dancing partner. Wow, totally lost respect for her (and for Tony, with Kate Gosselin.) They are supposed to be supportive pro teachers, figuring out how to bring out the best from their partners. If you can’t teach, leave, and just perform in the pro dances. I mean, wth, don’t start fights with your partner in that arrogant way.
Anyway, was sad to hear Jake and Vienna split, but SHOCKED to hear she actually sold the details of her sex life to a tabloid!!! Okay, you can drop the “fame” part of that word, now. Wow, how low-class can you get.
Again, no one on TWOP agrees with me, so thank goodness I have my little blog! :)
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I have to say a few words about this season’s Bachelor, starring Jake (the pilot, not Body By Jake, who is a famous personal trainer here in LA. Maybe all over, I don’t know.)
First of all, he is so not my type. He should be, blond and blue-eyed, fit, with a nice balanced body, okay hair. I mean, look at my 3-year long and counting crush on Derek Hough, right? But Jake, no. It’s all I can do to muster up even finding a photo of Jake to post here…
He was boring on my Jillian’s show, and looks to carry on his legacy on this one. I really don’t mind his putting God first. I do, too. But it’s no sense of humor, no interests besides flying, riding his stupid motorcycle and doing dangerous stunts, and a kind of judgmental attitude he seems to have. But prove me wrong, Jake, I don’t mind.
The 25 women tonight are all jumbled in my head, like a bowl of hard candies in wrappers.
WORST. MOD. ON Television Without Pity. I’ve said it before, and Barnes certainly wears this mantle proudly this month. Unfortunately for the popular Bachelorette forum, she’s there to bug all…
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More observations on The Bachelorette, Jillian Harris style:
Thinking more about Ed, he is funny as hell,? from his dolphin anecdote to the throwaway lines that the Editor allowed to sneak in. Funny and a hard worker and very handsome. Jillian chose well.
HOWEVER – the more I consider the Final Rose, I really think she was half way in love with Reid. I never thought she liked him as a boyfriend, so this surprises me – but when she let him go – both times- she really did have feelings for him. As Chris Harrison pointed out in his blog, who knows what she would have decided, if he hadn’t stepped in to give advice. I still think she would have chosen Ed, but that was a really close call.
Now, on to Jillian’s future! From Reality Wanted:
Q. Jillian, have you been offered anything in Chicago?
A. Jillian: Back home, I?ve gotten a few offers, which I don?t want to turn down until there are some finite plans. There?s been some talk of other TV things and I?m working on my hot dog book, but my main goal is to set my life back up and to get back to work as soon as possible.Q. What?s the deal with the Hot Dog Book?
A. Jillian: I?m trying to write something cute and funny about the hot dog theory and my dating life and just a girls guide to dating a guy. Maybe some short stories about guys I?ve dated, just something fun on how to get a read on a guy just by what he puts on his hot dog.
Hmm. Well, Jillian is going to need some good dating cartoons for the hot dog book, right? And I’ve been doing restaurant cartoons for years! And I have an entire book out of chocolate cartoons!! Hey! [Hand waving, somewhat like Queen Elizabeth.] Over here, Jilly!
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When our Bachelorette, Jillian Harris,? was writing a letter (in reply to letters from Ed and Kiptyn? – we never got to see that scene), her left-handedness was revealed. She’s just that special!
It really was an eventful Final Rose Ceremony. Jillian did glow, and she looked beautiful. The Bachelors looked properly nervous. There were rings. And Reid…did show up, and to Fleiss’s great satisfaction and relief, humiliated himself by asking Jillian to marry him when she already loved another.
Comments from Television Without Pity:
Reid didn’t seem that broken up by being turned down. I’m of the belief he’s been asked to be the next Bachelor, and this was part of the deal. They like their Bachelors to be jilted now and this ups the ‘ah, poor Reid’ quotient. I would hope if he really was there to propose seriously that he would have chosen to tuck his shirt in and wear something other then tennis shoes.
It was interesting to see Chris actually giving Jillian advice about how to handle Reid’s return. Has he ever done that before? But the million-dollar question in my mind is: why did they keep hiding Reid’s face? When he got down on one knee and said, “I love you,” we didn’t see him say it. We only saw Jillian’s face during that whole scene. Why? Hmmmmmm?.
I noticed the missing camera shots of Reid, too. Usually she pushes them into prime lens territory, so…was the camera on the blink?
Other stuff: The volcano erupting as Jillian and Ed retired into the bedroom suite was hysterical. See, the Editor at The Bachelorette does have a sense of humor. The other time I laughed out loud is when the red station wagon pulled up and Reid stepped out in his white sneaks and some half-assed clothes that I’m sure they told him to wear.
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